Buttons and Blame Page 11

  I heard the pain in her voice, the memories that still haunted her. She’d suffered much longer than I had. I’d only been Tristan’s plaything for a week before Cane came around. From what I understood, she was subjected to Bones’s torment for months before she escaped. There were thousands of women all over the world who had to suffer in the exact same way. It was innately wrong, a crime against humanity. “I know.”

  Cane wrapped his arms around my waist and squeezed me into his chest, his back against the headboard and his eyes dark in heated intensity. He pressed his forehead to mine and guided me up and down his length. We were both sheathed in arousal, our bodies wet with slickness. He moved deep inside me slowly, with purposeful gentleness that felt good. It’d been weeks since we screwed like animals. Now every time he was inside me, it was deep and slow, full of passion without violence.

  When he was inside me like this, I didn’t think about the limited time I had left. I only thought about those dark eyes as they bored into mine. I only thought about those soft lips, that hard jaw, and the way his hair curled when I ran my fingers through it.

  My legs had been forced apart, and my virginity had been taken away from me. It was cruel and painful. Being with Cane was completely different, like I’d been given a second chance to enjoy something that nearly broke me. He taught me it could feel good, that even if he was big, it didn’t hurt. He made me crave it when we were apart all day. He made me want it in the middle of the night. He made me want something I once despised.

  “Bellissima…” He took a deep breath as he squeezed my ass cheeks. He kneaded my ass with his fingertips, digging into the muscle. His cock continued to stretch me wide apart with every thrust, his length digging in deep inside me. “You torture me when you look like that.”

  “Like what?”

  “I call you Bellissima for a reason.” He pressed his face between my breasts and licked me, spreading kisses across my warm skin. He sucked my nipples into his mouth while he kept moving me down his length over and over. His hands glided up my full hips, and he kissed my neck, his warm breaths falling across my skin.

  I tilted my head back and rode him a little harder. “I’m gonna come…”

  He nibbled my neck, being more aggressive than before. He pulled me down his length harder, pushing through my tightness and sheathing himself in my soaking arousal. His hand moved between my legs, and he rubbed my clit aggressively.

  Like I needed any extra stimulation.

  I knew he needed me to come as quickly as possible because he couldn’t contain his excitement any longer. He was about to burst, filling me with all of his seed.

  I wrapped my arms around his neck and held on to him as I came, pushing down his length harder and deeper. I screamed in his ear, but he didn’t turn away. Moisture pooled between my legs and soaked his length. My entire body enjoyed him, soaring up high into the sky as I reached heaven and above.

  “Bellissima…” He grunted as he came, filling me with all of his desire. He moaned against my ear as he enjoyed the same pleasure I’d just experienced. He gripped me harder even though I wasn’t about to slip away. His fingers dug into me, and his chest was slick with sweat.

  I buried my face in his neck as I caught my breath, my body tightening and relaxing at the same time. My eyes closed, and I clung to him, feeling the only form of happiness I would ever know. When it was just the two of us, I didn’t think about what lay ahead. I only thought about the quiet peace that existed between us.

  Cane pulled away and looked me in the eye. He wore that tender expression he didn’t show often. It was gentle, showing the soft man underneath all that hardness. He kissed the corner of my mouth before he rolled me to the bed.

  We lay together, covered in sweat and warmth. His arm was still around me, his gloriously hard body rising and falling with the deep breaths he took. His large hand gently squeezed my waist, the area where most of my new pounds had settled.

  I noticed how much my body was changing from sitting around and eating amazing food all day long, but Cane didn’t seem to mind. The heavier I was, the more he wanted me. It was every woman’s dream come true.

  He rested his face in my neck and held me close, his body keeping mine warm once our bodies returned to a state of calm. His powerful muscles acted as a personal heater for both of us to enjoy.

  I couldn’t believe I only had a day left.

  Just one day.

  Cane pulled his head away from my neck and rested his face near mine. He looked me in the eye as his fingers grazed against my cheek. He tucked my hair behind my ear, his jaw tightening as he looked at me.

  Even his features were dark. He was tall, dark, and handsome, and he exuded danger. If I’d met him somewhere at night, I’d be afraid. Even now, he was still a little scary. But underneath that hard surface, he was a man with a heart as big as mine. He was a gentle giant, a friendly monster.

  A dark angel.

  He sighed as he looked at me, his thoughts resting on the surface of his eyes.

  This hurt him as much as it hurt me.

  “Thank you for being so good to me,” I whispered. “I’ve had the time of my life here.”

  “Don’t thank me.”

  “But you deserve to be thanked.”

  “No. Don’t act like you’re leaving. We still have time. Let’s not waste it.”

  9

  Cane

  This was harder than I’d imagined.

  I’d promised to take her back, but now that was the last thing I wanted to do.

  I shouldn’t care about her. The last month had given her peace and quiet, lots of food, and lots of great sex. I was gracious, and I even gave her the means to end her life so she wouldn’t have to suffer anymore.

  But I didn’t want that for her.

  I wanted her to enjoy the Tuscan countryside every day. I wanted her to eat whenever she wanted. I wanted her to smile every single day. I’d never cared about someone else’s happiness, but I certainly cared about hers.

  But there was nothing I could do. I had to take her back. That was part of the deal.

  Pearl had already confronted Tristan and tried to purchase Adelina like some kind of livestock. But Tristan wasn’t an idiot, so of course, he didn’t say yes.

  Maybe I could try again.

  Make him an offer he couldn’t refuse.

  I shut the door to my office on base and made the call.

  It rang several times, telling me he might not pick up at all.

  But he did. “Cane Barsetti. I thought I would be hearing from you sometime soon.”

  “Tristan.” It was difficult for me to be cordial. He was about to take my woman away, my Bellissima. “How are those weapons treating you?”

  “Worth every penny. You and your brother know what you’re doing.”

  “We do.”

  “So, your beautiful sister-in-law stopped by.”

  I’d suspected this would come up.

  “She’s got a mouth on her. I like it.”

  “My brother does too.”

  “I can see why. She asked to buy Adelina, but I compromised with a swap. She didn’t go for it.”

  Because she wasn’t an idiot.

  “Frankly, I thought it was a little disrespectful that she walked in here like she owned the place.”

  I wasn’t going to apologize for it, not when I had no idea she’d done it until after the exchange was over.

  “If she were anyone else, she’d be tied up right now. In fact, she’d probably already be dead. But I spared her…since I like you and Crow. But don’t expect me to be so gracious next time. Because I won’t be.”

  The threat wasn’t veiled, but I couldn’t rise in anger since he was justified in making the statement. It was a stupid thing for Pearl to do, and I couldn’t make an excuse for it. Her neck could have been snapped. She was too arrogant, wearing the Barsetti name. Thankfully, it protected her. “Like I said, she’s a handful. But my brother is into that.”

&nb
sp; Tristan chuckled. “I understand. Adelina is the same way.”

  Now I wanted to snap his neck. If only I’d seen Adelina first, she could have been my slave instead. She would have been treated well, treated with respect. She wouldn’t have even felt like a prisoner.

  “I expect you to be here tomorrow at seven in the evening. I’ll have the wire transfer ready.”

  I had little more than a day left with her. She was already out of my grasp even though she was still sitting in my house. “I have a business proposition for you.”

  “Really?” he asked. “This can’t wait until tomorrow?”

  “No. Keep the second deposit for the weapons. And let me keep Adelina.” I’d just put ten million dollars on the table. Even to rich men like us, that was considerable money. He’d only enjoyed Adelina for a week, so it wasn’t like he would be missing much. He could have his wallet stuffed with cash and keep the artillery at the same time.

  Tristan was dead silent.

  I couldn’t gauge how he felt about my offer.

  When Pearl walked into his lair, she didn’t have an offer. She didn’t have money to give. She was a terrible negotiator. Maybe dealing with me would have a different outcome.

  “You want to buy my whore?” he asked coldly.

  “Yes.”

  “I told Crow’s whore she wasn’t for sale.”

  I’d normally defend Pearl’s honor, but now wasn’t the time. Pearl would understand that. I was trying to leverage Adelina’s freedom—her life. “Everything is for sale—for the right price. Ten million dollars is a lot of money. We both know that.”

  “Yes. But that whore is priceless.”

  I clenched my jaw at the way he insulted her. I’d never called her such a thing. Never even thought about calling her such a thing. “Money is priceless, Tristan. How about fifteen million?”

  “No. I’ll swap her for that cunt that stopped by. That’s it.”

  “You don’t want her,” I said. “She’s a pain in the ass.”

  “And I wouldn’t mind being a pain in her ass.”

  My blood started to boil, infuriated he would speak of Pearl so viciously. “Twenty million.”

  “The more you offer, the more her value increases.”

  “Fine. Unlimited weapons for your soldiers—for a lifetime.” Maybe that would get him to reconsider.

  He was quiet.

  Hopefully, he was seriously considering it. It didn’t have an exact price tag, but it was a resource he could use forever. That added up to more than twenty million dollars—easily. It had to at least tempt him.

  Tristan broke his silence. “No.”

  My heart somersaulted into my stomach. If he didn’t take that offer, then there really was nothing else I could give him. His fascination for Adelina matched my own. There was nothing that could replace her. She really was invaluable—priceless.

  “I’ll see you tomorrow, Cane. And if you cross me…you know what will happen.” Click.

  I listened to the line go dead before I tossed my phone on my desk.

  A shadow was covering the sky, and I couldn’t see a thing. Everything was turning dark. A war loomed over the east, and now it was stretching to the west. Tristan was a powerful enemy I didn’t want to fight. Most of the wars of the world had been started over a beautiful woman.

  I wasn’t going to be one of those stupid men.

  I had to let her go.

  I had to let her suffer.

  And let her die.

  Crow stopped by the base in dark jeans and a t-shirt. He walked inside my office without knocking, probably payback for what I did to him a few days ago. My feet were on the desk, and I was enjoying a full bottle of scotch by myself. My mood was sour, my jaw was clenched, and I had a migraine that an entire bottle of liquor couldn’t fix.

  Crow stepped inside and examined the scene in front of him.

  I didn’t even glance at him. I held the cool glass against my temple, using the temperature to numb my migraine.

  Crow grabbed the bottle and helped himself to a glass. “I’m surprised you didn’t take the day off.”

  I should be home with Adelina, comforting her before I had to drop her off tomorrow. But I needed time alone, time to cushion my painful disappointment. I needed to drown myself in alcohol to feel numb. “I’ll head home in a little while.” I took a drink and stared at the other wall.

  “You doing alright?”

  “If you’re going to say stupid shit, don’t say anything at all.”

  Instead of walking out, Crow pulled up the chair and took a seat.

  “I called Tristan.” I set the glass on the desk and rubbed my temple.

  “And what was said?”

  “I offered to buy Adelina from him.”

  Crow sipped his drink as he swallowed my words. “I’m guessing he didn’t take your offer.”

  “No. I put twenty million on the table, and he didn’t blink an eye over it.”

  “Bones did the same thing for Pearl.”

  “Then I offered to commission him with weapons forever if he let me keep her.”

  Crow’s silence burned with anger.

  “Don’t worry, he didn’t go for that either.”

  “That must have been hard to turn down.”

  “Didn’t seem like it.”

  Crow took another drink. “So now what?”

  “I have to hand her over tomorrow at seven.”

  “I’m sorry, Cane. I know you’re fond of the girl.”

  I was too fond of her. I’d just told Crow I’d buy her for twenty million dollars. There was no hiding it now.

  “I already made this offer, but I’ll make it again. I can take her if that’s easier for you.”

  “No.” It had to be me. I wasn’t gonna be a coward. I’d have to be strong for her, to make her feel strong. “But thanks anyway.”

  “Is there anything I can do, Cane?”

  The only response I gave was a shake of my head. “Just leave me alone.”

  Crow didn’t move. He stayed in his seat, his drink still in his hand. “How about I be alone with you?”

  “Why?”

  “That’s what family is for, right? So you always have someone to be alone with.”

  I didn’t sleep last night.

  Neither did she.

  We made love a few times, but it wasn’t the same. We were both thinking about the next day, the moment when I had to hand her over. She was thinking about the grotesque look in Tristan’s eyes, and I was thinking about his hands all over her body.

  It was horrific.

  I told myself it would get easier as time went on. Year after year, I would slowly make my peace with it. But it didn’t seem like that would ever happen. I would always feel terrible for what happened to Adelina.

  That I didn’t save her.

  The next morning, she packed. I’d bought her a lot of nice things since she’d come to live with me, mainly designer clothes and hair accessories. She took up half my closet with her things. She opened her bag and began to stuff everything inside, but then she faltered.

  Because she knew there was no point in taking anything.

  She couldn’t wear the beautiful things I’d bought. She’d be stripped down until she was naked, chained to a wall in a cage. She wouldn’t have a closet. She wouldn’t get to shower. She would be a pig in a sty.

  Watching her return the clothes to the closet was the most painful thing I’d ever seen.

  She didn’t cry or issue a sniffle. But her body sagged with depression. Her spine curved, and her shoulders hunched forward. She sat at the edge of the bed and crossed her arms over her stomach, her knees pulled to her chest.

  I sat beside her, refraining from touching her.

  She stared at the floor, her chest rising and falling deeply. “Do you have the pills?”

  “Yes.”

  “Can I have them?”

  I didn’t move. “Where are you going to put them?”

  “I don’
t know…I’m not going to be wearing anything for long.”

  I cringed at the thought. “They won’t dissolve in your mouth. You can put one on the inside of each cheek…”

  “And then I can hide them in my room when he leaves me alone.”

  “Yeah…” I closed my eyes when I pictured her lying on a stone floor, her ankles chained to the wall and tears in her eyes. She was dirty, her scalp was oily, and she was skinny. The image was too difficult to bear, so I wiped it from my mind.

  She extended her hand, her palm facing the ceiling.

  I opened my nightstand drawer and pulled out the small plastic bag. I dropped it into her hand.

  She examined the pink pills, the perfect color to blend into her mouth.

  “It’ll be over in less than five minutes…”

  She nodded then placed them into her front pocket.

  I sat beside her in silence, watching the minutes trail by before we had to leave. Her essence was heavy in the bedroom, in the entire house. It would take a while before the smell finally disappeared, for me to sleep in the middle of the bed because I no longer had to share. I wouldn’t see her hair in the shower drain or her toothbrush sitting on the counter. This house would return to being empty, to being silent. Ever since the first day I’d moved in here, she was here with me. I’d never truly lived here alone.

  Now I would.

  It was hard to imagine coming home from work without seeing her. It was hard to imagine talking to Pearl and Crow like everything was normal when Adelina was obviously missing. I knew Pearl was thinking about both of us that very moment, knowing exactly what was to come.

  I waited for Adelina to cry. But she didn’t.

  I waited for her to shake. She didn’t do that either.

  She stayed absolutely still, staring at the opposite wall.

  There was nothing I could say to make this better, so I didn’t say anything at all. Words meant nothing at a time like this. She was literally marching to her death. The only consolation I gave her was those pills.