Husband Page 21

  Hades hadn’t taken his eyes off his brother. Now he was a distant figure two blocks away.

  I watched my husband cycle through many emotions—regret, loss, hurt. But in all the amount of time I’d known him, there never appeared to be anything missing. Now there seemed to be a huge hole in his heart, a void he couldn’t fill. Was that void Ash? Or was it something else?

  “Hades?”

  His eyes dropped down to mine.

  “Is there another reason why this is so important to you?”

  The only answer I got was silence.

  “Because you never mentioned Ash in all the years I’ve known you, and now you’re bending backward to make things right. You’ve taken weeks off work, and you seem intent on not giving up. Why is this so important to you now? Is there another reason?”

  He slowly dropped his arm from my waist. He pulled away his affection, as if he were battling his own demons. He never said much, but now it seemed like he wanted to say even less.

  I waited, practically holding my breath. Somehow, I knew whatever he was going to say was important.

  His chin tilted down slightly as he stared at the concrete beneath our feet. His hands slid into the front pockets of his jeans, and unlike his brother, he stood so rigid and proud, like he was a rock in the desert. “There is another reason…but I can’t tell you what it is.”

  18

  Hades

  I knew my wife respected me when she didn’t ask any questions.

  We had returned to Florence, and I sat on the balcony, letting the darkness wrap around me like a warm blanket on a cold day. My elbow rested on the arm of the chair, my fingertips against my chin. Summer was officially over; fall was on the way.

  Accepting the truth was like swallowing an enormous pill. It didn’t matter how much water I drank, I couldn’t get it down. I always got what I wanted, never stopped until I was a victor, but this time, I couldn’t win. Getting someone to obey you through force, torture, and money was easy. But getting someone to forgive you… That couldn’t be forced.

  So, I failed.

  Without my brother’s forgiveness, my life would be exactly the same. I would love a woman who would never love me back. Every day, my heart would grow for her, but hers would never change.

  Fucking depressing.

  But I had to accept it.

  Loving a woman who didn’t love me back was better than not loving her at all.

  I stared at the buildings across the street, trying to think of a way to get what I wanted, a way to convince my brother of my sincerity. But if Sofia couldn’t wear him down, then I never could.

  The patio doors opened, and Sofia’s bare feet hit the Italian pavers. She was in a black nightdress, ready for bed, but she looked so sexy that it didn’t seem like she was ready to sleep. We hadn’t said much on the flight home, and ever since we’d been back, we continued to let the silence fester. She didn’t bombard me with questions. And I hardly said any words.

  She glided toward me, the cold air making her nipples tighten through the silk material of her gown. Her long hair stretched past her shoulders, the curls coming loose after the long day we’d had. When she got to my side, her hand moved to my shoulder. With a woman’s touch, she gently rubbed my tight muscles and the warm skin at the back of my neck.

  I didn’t change my position, but my fingers slowly moved to her thigh. The backs of my knuckles lightly brushed against her soft skin. Those subtle touches couldn’t convey all the emotions in my heart. I was just a man very much attracted to his wife. Little did she know I couldn’t stop touching her because I was obsessively, devotedly infatuated with her. I didn’t adore her just for her looks, didn’t worship her for her good soul. It was much more than that.

  But I could never tell her that.

  My hand grabbed the material of her dress and gave a slight tug. She lowered into my lap, both of her legs stretching over my thighs. My arms flexed as I scooped her closer to me, our faces so close that my nose practically touched her cheek. I took a deep breath as I inhaled her perfume, summer roses and white lilies. My hand rested on both of her knees because my hands were so large compared to her petite frame.

  My lips lightly pressed against her cheek, a kiss so soft I wondered if she felt it. My mouth slowly moved to the shell of her ear, the back of her neck, and then along her jawline. I loved to kiss her just to kiss her. Didn’t have to go anywhere. Didn’t have to lead to sex. All I wanted was to adore her—because that was my right.

  I was her husband—I should adore her.

  Her arms moved around my neck as she turned her gaze to mine. Her makeup was gone, so her beautiful skin looked natural, real. When she stared at me like that, sometimes it seemed like she adored me as much as I adored her, like she couldn’t live without me the way I couldn’t live without her.

  I looked into her eyes and somehow knew a question would erupt from her lips.

  “Why can’t you tell me?” she whispered. She’d kept the question to herself for the last two days, but when the curiosity became too much, she cracked. Her left hand fell from my neck and drifted over my shoulder. Her palm flattened against my chest, as if she were trying to feel my heartbeat.

  I dropped my gaze for just a moment, wishing I could tell her the truth, the whole truth. I wanted her to know everything, every feeling in my heart, every confession in my soul. I wanted her to know that we were meant to be together, that she was the only woman I wanted to be with—because she was the other half of my soul. “Because I can’t.”

  “Why?”

  “Baby, I just can’t.”

  Her eyes filled with disappointment. “Will you ever?”

  “Yes.”

  “I know whatever the reason is, it must be important. I’ve never seen you work so hard for something, especially something that seems hopeless. I know you don’t agree with your brother’s choice of livelihood. I know it kills you inside. But whatever you need from him must be bigger than that.”

  Yes—it was the biggest thing in my life.

  “If you tell me…maybe I can help you.”

  “No one can help me.”

  “But—”

  “Drop it.” I hated to cut her off so coldly. She was only trying to help me, but talking about this only made me feel worse. I wasn’t able to save us, and my secret hurt her too.

  She wasn’t affronted by my coldness. Instead, her eyes were filled with pity. Her hand moved across my chest, and her fingers dug into the back of my hair. She slowly leaned in and pressed her forehead to mine, bringing our hearts, bodies, and souls close to each other. “Are you going to give up?”

  I closed my eyes and whispered into the darkness. “Never.”

  I rose to my feet and lifted her with me. She was a stack of pillows, a soft cloud because she was so small. Like a husband carrying his wife over the threshold of their home for the first time, I carried her inside and laid her on the bed.

  When her head hit the pillow, her hair naturally spread across the sheets. Her hands moved to her hips, and she pushed her panties down her legs, getting ready for me even though I’d just rejected her. Like a real husband and wife, it didn’t matter if we disagreed. At the end of the night, we still wanted each other.

  Watching her want me was sexier than watching any other woman want me. I could pretend that she loved me, that her feelings mirrored my own. It was so easy to do.

  When she looked at me like that.

  I got my bottoms off without taking my eyes off hers. Her legs automatically opened for me, letting me slide to the place where I belonged. It was a parking spot reserved just for me, the piece of her I owned exclusively.

  Our bodies combined together, our heated breaths echoing in the bedroom. My hands slid into the back of her hair, and my eyes focused on hers. She was the only thing in the world that really mattered to me. I used to think money and power triumphed over everything else, but now I realized I could give all that away and live in a tiny house with her and
be just as happy. My old life was a distant memory. I couldn’t even remember the women I had been with before her. She had the power to erase my past, to make me forget there was a time when she didn’t exist.

  Maybe she would never love me—but as long as I had this, I would be okay.

  I was sitting behind my desk at the bank when Damien walked in. Papers were scattered around my desk, and my laptop was disorganized with a bunch of random shit I could never stay on top of.

  Damien wore a midnight black suit, and he unbuttoned the front of his jacket before he took a seat. “Sorry about your brother.”

  I leaned back in the chair and brought my hands together. “It is what it is.”

  “You aren’t the kind of man to give up easily.”

  “Actually, I’m the kind of man that doesn’t give up at all.”

  He relaxed in his chair, his knees relaxing wide apart. His fingers interlocked at the back of his neck, like he was vacationing at a resort, not sitting in my office. “Then why are you giving up now?”

  “I haven’t. Just taking a break.”

  “Yeah, that’s probably a good idea. You might annoy him so much he ends up killing you. Then nobody wins.”

  I didn’t want to talk about the issue with Sofia anymore. It was all I’d been thinking about lately, and I needed a break from the suffocation. “How’s the Newton account? You didn’t fuck it up while I was gone, right?”

  “Newton account?” he asked. “No idea what you’re talking about.”

  I raised an eyebrow. “I’m not in the mood, Damien.”

  He chuckled. “Geez, you need to lighten up. Of course I took care of the Newton account. I do a better job running this place than you do.”

  “Bullshit.”

  He shrugged. “I was the one taking care of it while you were gone in Rome…”

  “I did what I had to do. You know that.” After everything that happened with Ash, I realized I may never get what I wanted. That meant I had to be careful, look over my shoulder because I had so much to lose. If I was willing to live in a shack with Sofia, then there was no point in me fighting for the money and power I used to care so deeply about. “I want to talk to you about something.”

  “I feel like all we ever do is talk. Let’s do something else like…like parachuting.”

  I ignored what he said. “I’ve decided to keep my word to Maddox. We aren’t going to start this corporation again. He gave me an ultimatum, your life or the business. I made my decision, and I stick by it. It sucks. It sucks that it happened, it sucks that he humiliated us…but we lost. It’s time to walk away.”

  Damien dropped his hands from the back of his neck, his face slowly slackening as the horrible news hit him in the chest. He began to lean forward, his entire body indicating his opposition to what I’d just said. “Fuck no. It’s never time to walk away. I’m not lying down like some kind of pussy. We’ve been working on this for a decade. Maybe he won that battle, but we’ll win the war.”

  “Damien. No.”

  “Just because you say no doesn’t mean no. Half of that business is mine. You can drop out of the race, but that doesn’t mean I have to.” He rose to his feet and slowly approached my desk. His hands slid into his pockets, and he looked at me with sheer disappointment. “Where the hell is this coming from?”

  “It’s not coming from anywhere. It’s the right thing to do.”

  “There’s no such thing as the right thing. There’re only winners and losers. And, asshole, I’m not going to be a loser.” He rested his palm on my desk, his hand slowly balling into a fist.

  “I have too much to lose, Damien.” I rose to my feet to meet his gaze. We were both over six feet, both powerful and strong. If our fists flew at each other’s faces, it would be an even match. “I don’t want to lose this business any more than you, but I have a wife to think about. If Maddox comes after her, it’ll kill me. And if he just wants me, she’ll lose me. Either way, she loses everything. I’m sorry, Damien. But that decision is final.”

  He cocked his head to the side, his eyebrows furrowed like that decision was questionable. “And what about me?”

  The anger rushed in my veins, the memory of that night when I’d told Damien to listen to me and he refused. “We’re in this goddamn mess because of you. Let’s not forget that. If you would have just listened to me, none of this would have happened. So no, asshole, you don’t get a say in this.”

  His rage slowly faded away, guilt entering his gaze. He’d gone after Maddox when I told him not to, and I’d paid for his mistake with our business. He couldn’t argue with that.

  “Alright?”

  After a deep breath, he spoke. “Fine.” He returned his hand to his pocket and stepped away from my desk. He started to pace in my office, examining my bookshelves and the art on the walls. “Well, we’ve got a problem.”

  Fuck. What did he do?

  “While you were gone, I continued production. There’s a bit of crystal on the streets.” He stopped pacing and faced me once more.

  I could feel the heartbeat in my temples, like I was fighting the worst migraine of my life. My body immediately went into fight-or-flight mode, but all I wanted to do was fight. I’d turned my back for one second, and Damien fucked everything up. He’d always been the irrational one between the two of us, the impulsive one. I suspected that would ruin me eventually. “You did what?”

  “Look, I had already started right after you left. That crystal is in the hands of our distributors now.”

  “But I told you to wait.”

  “And I did wait, but I can’t stop the distributors from selling our product. I kept production going because I didn’t see the harm in that. I mean, how is Maddox gonna know if we’re producing anything?”

  Both of my hands planted against the sides of my face, and my fingers dug into my skull. “Because he knows shit, asshole. If he figures this out, he’s gonna come at us hard. We aren’t the least bit prepared.”

  “Chill. He’s not gonna find out. I’ll make some calls and get our shit off the street.”

  “It might be too late.”

  “But it might not be.” He returned to my desk. “Let’s worry when there’s actually something to worry about. There’re only a few kilos on the street. I’m sure he’ll assume it’s some rogue dealers since we’re out of the picture. I’ll make sure production is halted, and this will all go away.”

  “It better go away, Damien. Because this is over…for good.”

  He looked at the ground. “I’m happy you found Sofia. I really am. But if she weren’t around, you wouldn’t be scared of anything. You would be the king of the underworld, the man who would do anything to stay on top. Now you’ve just given up.”

  “Because I’m married now, Damien. What kind of husband would I be if I didn’t put my wife first?”

  “You’d be just like every other husband in the world. That’s not why you’re doing this. You’re doing this because you’re in love with her… That’s the big difference.”

  19

  Sofia

  Hades had been in a bad mood for the past week. He worked long hours, he came home late, sometimes skipped dinner, and the only time we really had together was when we were fucking. Then he went to sleep and was gone early the next morning.

  He probably had to catch up on all the work he’d missed, but he didn’t give me a lot of details. I tried not to ask because it seemed to put him in a worse mood.

  When he admitted he had another reason to reconcile with his brother, I couldn’t figure out what that reason could possibly be. And I couldn’t figure out why it had to be a secret either. But I had to remind myself that this was his personal business, his family, and if he wanted to talk about it, he would.

  But if he had told me the truth…maybe I could’ve helped.

  I was sitting on the couch in the bedroom with my laptop on my thighs, a glass of wine beside me, and I was drinking earlier than I usually did. Every time I grabbed the
glass, my wedding ring tapped loudly against the surface. I brought it to my lips for a drink just when Hades walked through the door.

  He stepped inside, stealthy in a black suit and a matching tie. The color matched his brooding nature, matched his scruff along his jaw. The first thing he did was walk to his dresser and open the top drawer. On the surface was an assortment of watches he’d collected over the years. He unclasped the one he wore and placed it inside.

  “You look like a serious collector.” I set my glass down and rose to my feet.

  He shed his jacket from his broad shoulders and tossed it on the chair. Next, he grabbed the front of his tie and loosened it.

  I walked to the drawer and looked down at the collection of watches. All different, all unique. Some were white gold, some were black, and some had leather straps. “Did you buy all of these?”

  He unbuttoned his shirt, undoing each button until the shirt opened and revealed his perfect physicality. “No.” He pulled his shirt off his arms and tossed it aside. Now he stood with perfect posture, tight arms, and a core so strong he was nothing but lines and muscle. “Most of them were gifts.” He reached inside and grabbed a white-gold one. He turned it over and showed me the engraving underneath. “Damien gave me this for my birthday a few years ago.”

  I could see the small letters. It read, Happy Birthday, Asshole.

  “That was sweet…” The corners of my lips tugged into a smile when I read the message his closest friend wrote.

  He returned the watch back to the velvet lining.

  “Can I look at them?”

  He turned to me, giving me that intense stare that always made me melt. “You can do whatever you want, baby. Everything you see, it’s yours.” He wasn’t trying to be romantic, but when he wrapped his arm around my waist and pulled me tight for a kiss, it was the most romantic thing in the world. He kissed me with aggressive lips, giving me tongue the second he had me. His hand reached down to my ass for a tight squeeze then a gentle spank. When he was done, he grabbed my glass of wine and took a drink.